Topics: | WEIRD DAILY NEWS | AGING | LIFE | WOMEN | SEX | CURIOSITIES | MY FUTURE | HUMAN
BEHAVIOUR | MYSELF | THE
UNIVERSE | EXPECTATIONS | TOUGH TIMES | BEING
MORBID | NO EVIL PEOPLE EXIST | "GOD'S
INTENTIONS" | DEMONS | "EMPATHIC
FAILURE" | HAVING KIDS | HUMAN
RIGHT - To Make Fire! |
1. In no way am I encouraging the process of thinking. These
writings are purely hypothetical and for the purposes of entertainment
only. I take no responsibility for anything that happens to
anyone as a result of thinking. It is a scientifically proven
FACT that thinking causes cancer. The more you think, the
more likely you will experience stress, and stress is what
causes cancer. Any of the ideas expressed in the following
writings may change without notice at any time.
2. Most of these were written over 10 years ago. From now
on, I'll date them as I go
have the look of a man who accepts what he sees because
he is expecting
to wake up. Ironically, that's not far from the truth."
::: Morpheus :::
put another way....
your life you live so close to truth it becomes a permanent
blur in the corner of your eye. And when something nudges
it into outline, it's like being ambushed by a grotesque.
in "Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead" (1990) :::
I think about 'things' all the
time. I am a gemini. Geminis are the thinkers of the
zodiac. I think mostly when I am alone. I think whilst
taking a dump, while walking home at 2am, while trying
to get to sleep and when the traffic lights are red
(which is not very often these days, since my jedi-powers
are getting to the stage where I can easily turn a red
light into a green light). Anyway, I think about all
sorts of things. Some of which are actually useful and
Keep in mind that all subjects without a date were pre 2002, so they might be a but 'out-dated'
RANDOM WEIRDNESS IN THE PAPER Dec 2009
I rarely read the newspaper so maybe that's why I find what I'm reading in this Sunday's paper so weird...
On the cover is a story about a beautiful 22 year old who died after being warned about sitting on a balcony rail and falling. I don't get this. I've sat on balcony edges and talked to people about it. I don't understand why someone who's not confident they are safe, would do this...Unless you have your legs locked around the rails somehow, why would you risk it?
The next story I read was about a father who was taken by a shark in Western Australia, where I used to swim, surf and snorkel. It's well known that you shouldn't be in the water around sunrise or sunset. (He was snorkelling early in the morning)
I'm not saying this story is weird but it is a rare even in WA. It happens, just relatively, not that often.
I briefly gloss over yet another story about the highly publicised cricket celebrity who repeatedly cheated on his ex-wife - they are apparently getting back together. My my boggles how anyone can care and why this keeps getting publicity. Instead of the man being shamed out of all lime-light and his career, he continues to be treated as a celebrity. The guy is a dickhead and I wish he wouldn't get money from his fame. It seems to me that all too often criminals and dickheads attract fame and make money out of it. Morons supporting morons. It makes me sick.
The next story I read was about 35 'bouncers' facing charges in the crackdown on security licensing. (This has been going on because of the number of fatal assaults by bouncers)
Next, title; "Boy, 4, dies in tractor accident". I just don't understand how a 4 year-old even gets to be in a position to be run over by a tractor...
The next short story I read is about a 60 year old man who was hospitalised by teenagers who bashed him. I simply can't believe how often this happens! Every time I hear or read the news some old man or old woman is bashed. I can understand the motivation for most crimes. Bashing someone who can't defend themselves is something I'll never really understand. Makes me angry.
The next (this is one of a couple of stories I actually liked) short story is how our Prime Minister, Kevin Rudd, saved a baby Tawny Frogmouth which had fallen out of it's nest. Good on ya mate.
The next story I read really pisses me off. It's entitled, 'Military steal to buy drugs'. Basically our military gives two thirds of all it's staff credit cards to buy fuel and pay for travel expenses. That, in itself, is outrageously excessive! That is my tax dollars ($80M a year). The next thing that's outrageous is that there's no accountability for these cards! It works on a "system of trust"! The result?; 220 reported cases of fraud. Hundreds of thousands of dollars worth which are going to pay for these clowns' debts, drugs and gambling. So far 40 personnel have been convicted.
The next story I saw, was one about Caroline Kennedy's senate hopes - (not really interested), followed by a story about how well Barrack Obama is going, which I am glad to read.
'The Human fat Mobile'. Here's where things start going weird. Dr Alan Bittner allegedly turns human fat, taken from liposuction, into diesel to power his car.
Weird as it is, I love the idea. Unfortunately (and absurdly) it's illegal, in the US, to use human medical waste to power vehicles (how did they come up with this lay?!).
Incidentally on the same page is a colour photo of a baby aardvark. Yep, it's weird. Another smile on my face. This has got to be one of the cutest things I have ever seen.
Pakistan and India are sending masses of troops to their boarders and upsetting everyone concerned...
Title; "Santa's Slaughter toll grows". Ok, so here's a guy (Bruce Pardo) dressed as Santa who goes to a party at his former in-laws', knocks on the door, shoots the 8 year old girl who answers the door in the face, storms in and and sprays the 25 guests with bullets, sets fire to the house and then kills himself.
Picture Santa shooting everyone in the room.... Weird.
AGING Aug 2008
Turning 30 (or thereabouts) was really the first time,
in my life, that I realised that I am actually mortal.
I will, one day, die......
I'm not kidding.
I'm not sure what exactly I thought before
this awful realisation.
Maybe I just never stopped to actually think
Maybe, if it entered my mind, I'd brush 'it' off with
a thought about how pointless it was thinking soooo far ahead.
Maybe I believed that by the time I past my late 70s,
science would have conquered the aging machanism and
I would be able to choose when 'my time' comes....
Anywhoo, this is not actually what i was thinking
I was thinking about thinking.
I always believed that
the older I got, the wiser I would become.
I thought that the older I got the easier life-thinking
and decision-making would become.
I thought I would know myself better each and every
Learning more about the world, experiencing more and
thinking more, should naturally make everything
that goes on between my ears easier....
Well, it ain't so!
I have no dea how this is for other people, but I find THINKING-thinking (the tough
stuff, not basics like how long it will take to buy
a new car on my current budget) no easier
than say, 10 years ago....
I'd say a lot of THINKING-thinking is more difficult now than when I was younger.
Maybe I'll elaborate and explore later - for now, I
can't be bothered thinking about it anymore.
This is probably, although I don't make any promises,
one of the 'useful' ones to think about. Life, I think,
is very unusual, not unlike the people, you see wondering
around at 3am on a Saturday night. Life too, is unusual
and unpredictable. Just when you think you have figured
out 'the rules' they change and do a complete 180 on
you! It is unusual that good things happen to bad people
and that bad things happen to good people... I think
about that a lot. It's also unusual that we are all
so very different...People who are sexually attracted
to FAT members of the opposite sex, the Dugong, Hare
Krishnas, F-Orbitals (I'm told), mating habits of the
blind, blunt-nosed wombat.....All these things are unusual...
Life is wonderful and unfair... I wonder if you can
indeed learn enough about it to begin to 'bend' the
rules in your favour. My friend Raz, calls this 'fucking
with the universe'. I call it Jedi mind-tricks. Some
would just call it the power of thought. Do we have
the power to change our life and destiny? I think about
NO, no sexist jokes, and no drivel, so don't start rolling
your eyes. Ok, STOP rolling your eyes upwards!!!! I'm
male, hence I think about women. Why? Apart from the
obvious - that women are wonderfull creatures to think
and dream about, they are very interesting. Women smell
nice. I think about this sometimes. I'm not talking
about perfume either, I've thought about that already.
Women have a 'way' about them that can completely entrance
most men. I think about this too. What is this strange
power that women have? The power to make men do things
that they wouldn't ordinarily do. Women are also very
ilogical. Spock would get a headache trying to understand
the human woman. I'm not saying women are ilogical all
the time. THAT would make the life of the logical male
much easier. It would be a constant, and we can deal
with constants... Like the weather, we can deal with
the fact that it changes every day because that's it's
'nature'. BUT... a woman will behave in an 'apparently'
constant way until we 'men' think we 'understand'....It's
right about the time that we think we have some sense
of understanding of the female species, that 'they'
CHANGE. Something irrational or ilogical happens.. go
figure. I think about that.
It was bound to be one of the topics of "Thinking".
Aren't you proud of me that it wasn't the first on the
list?! Yes, I admit it. It's true. Men DO actually think
about sex 90% of the time. I think about this. I believe
it is instinct. We were MADE that way. It's to do with
nature and procreation. We have millions of sperm and
basically were designed to impregnate as many women
as we possibly can. Don't get mad at me, this is what
they teach at Uni. I think a lot of guys 'just think
about sex'; sex they have had, sex they are having and
sex they want to have. I, however, think about a lot
more than that. I have thought about whether or not
sex has a 'power'. Sex causes a lot of problems, sex
is a drive and sex makes some people fall in love. Sex
is a big part of life. The act is supposed to be sacred....
there are a lot of reasons why I suspect that sex has
a magic or 'power' to it. I also think about sex and
'making love'. Some people know only one way. Some have
no concept of 'making love', others have never believed
in sex and only ever have it when love is involved.
I think about this I think about the 'Manogamy Denial'.
A great movie to watch (guys, DO NOT watch this with
your girlfriend!) is "Denial". Basically the 'Manogamy
Denial' is pretty much what it sounds like. The way
society imposes the rule of manogamy on us. 'Denial'
because many people doubt that being manogamous is 'natural'.
Looking at nature definately does not suggest that manogamy
is prevalent. Looking at the 'design' of the male body
is also inconsistant with the manogamy ideal. More superficially,
we can simply look at relationships and see that everyone
has cheated. It's a tough one..A definate cancer-causer.
I, myself, have a problem with manogamy. This is not
because I don't respect any one person with whom I am
having a relationship with. Just as I find one person
to love whole-heartedly, I can find 3 others. I can't
help it. Just because I am with one wonderful and sexy
person, doesn't mean I won't meet and be attracted to
another one! At the same time, I truly believe, that
when I meet someone who 'tops all of 'em' I will be
more than happy not to stray... I think think think
By 'curiosities', I mean 'little' things, insignificant
things, that aren't important or life-altering; I can
tell when my cat is thinking. He sits there with his
head tilted to the side and thinks. (I hope it won't
give him cancer...). Well, I think about what he is
thinking. I wonder what people are thinking too sometimes.
I wonder if germs get germs, if birds can get scared
of heights, What happens if you get scared half-to-death,
TWICE?, What color does a smurf turn when you choke
it? Would cannibals not eat clowns because they taste
funny? If 'horrific' is something horrible then why
isn't terrific something terrible?....and I wonder;
Do androids dream of electric sheep?
I'm sure some people don't think much about their future.
I do. I often think about what I want to do and how
I'm going to do it. Since I am now what I hope is only
a short time away from being a millionaire, I think
a lot about 'how' I am going to spend my millions. I
know that I won't WORK, as such. Sure I may indulge
in a bit of business, but I will never again 'clock
in' for a nine to five day of labour. As soon as I recieve
my millions, I will buy myself a better car, probably
a Lotus Elise. I'll also have to get a more practical
car, most likely a Jeep. Another immediate spenditure
would be buying all my friends something really good.
Mum and Dad of course, will be top of the list for gifts.
I think I would buy a house or flat or cabin at my favourite
holiday destination. Most likely near an awsome surfing
spot. Within my first week of becomming a millionaire...well
actually, "multi-millionaire", I will buy an aircraft.
Probably a Cessna 310. Seeing as I have never owned
a decent home entertainment system, I'd get a huge TV,
a VCR, stereo and of course a PlayStation or something
alike. I'd buy a new computer every year or so... 'Things'
aside, I also think about what I will DO. Travel is
an obvious one. I would travel lots. I'd go to Africa
and see Kruger National Park again, I'd go to Europe...everywhere...yes,
I'd go everywhere. I do think I'd get bored doing all
the stuff that most people come up with if someone asks
them what they'd do if they won the lottery. I think
about this too. What will I do when I begin to get bored?
As much as I think I couldn't get bored of traveling,
flying, surfing etc etc, I do think of what I'd do to
keep from getting bored. I guess I'd run a business
or work on some kind of project. If you are wondering
why I believe I will be a multi-millionaire, it's because
a friend and I have come up with an awsome idea/invention.
It is very simple and will very likely be wortha fortune
if it works the way we expect it to.
We are WEIRD! Let's face it, people are about as weird
as weird can get. 'Weird' is interesting, and so I find
myself thinking about people. The way people act, the
way they communicate and the way they interelate. I've
always been thinking about 'what makes people tick'.
WHY people behave the way they do. Why people act differently
to what they are actually like, why people have problems,
how they deal with them, what makes a person attractive,
why people are SO different from one another. Examples:
Don't you think it's weird how 'self-conscious' people
can be? You can walk up to a complete stranger and stick
your hand out at him/her and MOST likely they will shake
your hand. Yes, somewhat perplexed, but non the less,
they shake your hand even though they have no idea who
you are! Why? Because they feel under pressure, they
are scared to embarrass themsleves because they are
self-conscious or insecure. It's funny. Or try waving
to a passing car. They will usually wave back for the
same reason...'Oh don't want to embarrass myself by
showing I don't remember that person, who obviously
remembers me'. How about when you accidentally bump
into someone or cross paths...Why do we say 'Sorry'?
I mean are you REALLY 'sorry ?! No, you don't know them,
you didn't do it on purpose, so you are not sorry. "Oops"
or "excuse me", I can understand, it's polite. We are
really a scared lot. Always worried about what other
people will think... I think about that a lot. Another
thing along the same lines that amuses me to no end
is 'looks'. People love to look at other people. Curiosity,
appreciation, interest or even contempt. But the funny
thing is, most of the time we try not to get 'caught'
looking! Weird. Everyone does it. I don't mind when
people look at me... I have great fun with this. I look
at people and don't hide it. Or I make sure I catch
them looking at me and act acordingly. I'ts fun. "IDEALS"
I think about ideals all the time. What brought on this
particular mention of ideals is the evening I had. 6:30am
and I just got home from being out at a club with some
friends. My friend, David, is getting married. This
brought about all sorts of discussion from myself and
the others. I guess in a way, we were all reflecting
our past and current experiences on him...poor sod.
There he is, about to embark on one of the major-league
events in life, and we are scaring the shit out of him!
As I said, I think about 'ideals' a lot. I have a lot
of ideals. The thing I am thinking about at the moment,
is the ideal person. Does such a person exist. If you
say 'yes', then would it ring true. Would this 'ideal'
person still be ideal after you get to know them intimately?
Further more, would this ideal person still be ideal
months and years down the track? Hmmm... As much thought
as I have given it, I still don't know. In my old age
I have become a little bitter I guess. I remeber talking
to my friends over coffees, I was saying that I have
never been in a relationship where everything was 50/50.
You know you each give as much as you get? Well it's
true. I have never had that. I have always been giving
more. So I says: "Marriage could work if you met someone
just like yourself, someone who has the same ideals/beliefs".
This is probably true... I'm going to sleep now, but
I'll probably expand on this...
Uhmm... No, not in a vain or egomanic way... I think
about my self in a reflective way. Who am I? Who was
I previously? Do others see mee the way I see myself?
There's no way I could possibly explain how much I think
or how deep my thinking goes, but here's an example:
I often wonder what is wrong with me... - This is your
cue to laugh - Ok... finished?...... Right. Ok.. you
can stop laughing now! Seriously, I look at my life
and see the things I have done... I compare this with
what I expected to have doen by this particular stage
of my life...and it's not the same... I wonder why I
don't achieve my goals... Probably because I keep making
new goals..... I also wonder why I don't take care of
myself...Why I am irresponsible with myself...Why I
still smoke.. Perhaps I don't love myself enough? I
also think about my spiritual evolution... I worry that
I have slowed down more now than ever before. I hope
I haven't made any backward steps... This must be serious
'cancer-thinking' Oh well.
Here's a good one: To begin, lets lay down some accepted
premiss' (A) The universe is INFINITE. (B) Since the
universe is infinite, anything and everything MUST exist.
(else it wouldn't be infinite - duh.) Since we know
everything and anything must exist, 'Absolute Nothingness'
must also exist. Here's where we have a 'problem', with
our finite, human way of thinking, this is impossible/inconceivable
since Infinity and Absolute Nothingness cancel each
other out. Or so we think. How can both co-exist???
If you have Infinity (everything) then you certainly
can't have Absolute Nothingness, and vice versa. This
bothered my friend, Raz, and I for quite some time.
We knew that Infinity AND Absolute Nothingness MUST
both be true to satisfy our first premise (The universe
is Infinite), but couldn't explain HOW? EASY The problem
with our thinking was; TIME If you 'destroy' time,(take
it out of the equation), then both CAN be true. In an
infinate universe time is irrelevent. Without time,
Absolute Nothingness and Infinity (Absolutely Everything),
BOTH ... ARE ! .... The light of a torch can be both
on and off, if time is NOT considered. Bravo! We will
accept our Nobel Prize now... thanks.
For the last 3+ years I have been doing away with expectations.
Expectations (in general) are stupid things. How can
we EXPECT ANYTHING?! Can you REALLY expect tomorrow
to happen? If you can, then are you so clever as to
know WHAT to expect? Can you really expect people to
be or do what YOU want them to? No.... - What the hell
am I on about? - I am 'on about' the 'folly' in expecting
things of the world and the people in it! Ok, take a
simple example; With the possible exception of some
very 'enlightened' souls, we all have expectations of
the people that we have relationships with. We may 'expect'
our friends to understand us, our lovers to please us,
our teachers to provide good learning, our parents to
love us and nurture us, the world to be fair (or unfair),
life to be happy (or harsh)....etc... Whatever our expectations
are - THEY ARE UNFAIR! Yes, 'unfair'! Unfair to ourselves
and unfair to those we have expectations of. Think about
it without the influence of so called social 'norms'.
What is the logic or sense in expecting, let's say a
friend, to be with you in your darkest hour? (1) You
will be VERY dissapointed if they are NOT (2) You are
weakening yourself by USING your expectations (and your
friend) as a crutch or security blanket. (3) To varying
degrees you are taking away the gift of 'giving' from
your friend.(If it is expected then you are not as greatful
for their understanding and support than if you don't
expect anything from them) (4) Over and over again,
you are setting yourself up for pain. No one will ever
live up to all our expectations. If you really want
to, you can find plenty of grief if you choose to have
epectations of the people around you. By expexcting
things of the people around you, you are putting pressure
on them. This is hardly fair! (5) The things or people
you have expectations of may not even be there tomorrow!
The 'flip-side' of 'expectations' is that when people
around you (or the world) DO bring you happiness and
joy you are VERY pleasently surprised and TRULY appreciative!
By true appreciation, you are giving people the gratitude
they deserve (rather than a more selfish 'thankyou,
but this is what I expect of you anyway"). Beware you
do not misunderstand my stance. I am not saying that
we would benefit in being cold, nor in expecting the
worst, or any other negative 'view' on people or the
world. All I am suggesting is a REALISTIC nuetral approach,
where you accept and love the world and the people in
it for what and who they are. When they are bad, you
don't cry beacuse you expected them to be good. When
they are good, you are happy, since you didn't expect
that either! Some of the 'dearest' to my heart have
a hard time with this (which is not surprising since
we are conditioned to have expectations from toddler-hood!).
I wish I could share my experience and liberation, the
freedom of shedding expecatations with everyone. So
follows an example: You have planned a 'night out'.
You expect it to be good. You have saved money, you
got ready to party, you planned where to go, and you
have pre-conceived expectations of the nice people you
will meet and how 'nice' they will be to you. Wow...
imagine the number of things that could RUIN your whole
night! A simple circumstancial mishap on the way there,
a rude doorman, not meeting anyone nice, a rude patron,
losing your money, not being able to get in where you
want, etc etc etc... If all goes well, you are satisfied...
(note, 'satisfied', not over-joyed or ecstatic). Same
night, but you go out without any pre-conceived expectations.
You go right ahead and plan where you go, even spare
a minute for a 'wish'...But you also know that anything
may happen. When someone is rude to you or something
goes wrong you shrug it off, you are not dissapointed
because you KNOW 'these things happen' and you adjust
accordingly. Most likely even with several 'boo-boos'
you will still have a great night, beacuse you had an
open mind!!! Low and behold if you have a great time
or meet someone who you enjoy, you will not be 'just
satisfied' you will feel very happy.. perhaps even blessed!
So fellow souls - Wake up and smell the coffee! Don't
set yourself up expecting it to be good or bad!
Thoughts during a very rough patch -
Ways you know that things can't get any worse:
1. You wash a friend's car, just for
something to do.
You talk to people you don't even like.
3. You wonder if you could 'live off the land'.
4. You actually went to a public park to sleep in it.
5. You walk past a house in the burbs and envy how well
the pet cat there lives.
6. You begin thinking of ways to rob a bank.
7. Deciding between a packet of cigarettes and a meal
is a major dilema.
8. You've had the longest hour of your life, the longest
day AND the longest week.
9. You are prepared to ask your ex, ex-boss for a loan.
10. Hitch-hiking across the entire continent seems like
a good idea.
11. You would trade a non-vital body part for an airfare.
12. You have slept in a park, a car, a caravan, 2 couches,
and ex-girlfirend's place and an office in the same
13. You begin asking God for favours.
14. You begin cursing God for not delivering.
15. Cafe staff automatically give you cancelled orders.
16. You have been wearing the same clothes for many
17. You keep kicking yourself about bridges you happily
torched in better days.
18. You live out of a backpack.
19. You now consider a shower a luxury.
20. Talking to strange old men is oddly pleasant.
21. People you remember as 'flatmates from Hell', suddenly
don't seem that bad at all.
22. Small animals, like pidgeons, begin to look like
23. You wonder about things like; if a company would
give you money to tatoo their logo on your body.
24. People have given you money because they feel bad
25. You wonder if it's possible to stow away on an aircraft.
26. To pass the time, you make lists like this one!
27. You actually wish you knew a loan-shark.
28. You find yourself checking pockets you know are empty, 'just incase'...
29. Breakfast is a cigarette and someone else's coffee.
30. You have no idea where you'll be sleeping tonight.
31. If you had a beautiful girl ask you for sex, you'd
reply; "It'll cost you".
32. You would ask a beautiful girl for sex, but you'd
only be interested in her bed.
- lost notes -
62. You've always suspected that boredom sucks but now
you could write an essay on just how hard it does in
63. You try to figure out what terrible thing you must
have done in a past life to deserve this.
64. Sleeping in a park has now graduated to 'a damn
65. "If only" is one of the most frequent
begginings of your thoughts
66. Seeing beautiful women make eyes at you on a Friday
night is painful. (You have nothing to offer)
67. You see a girl with a great arse and you wonder
if it's edible.
68. You are wearing 3 shirts and still feel cold.
69. When no matter how many times you try, you can simply
NOT see this situation as a challenge.
70. When a parking meter is your financial superior.
71. You start asking yourself whether or not, you would
eventually kill for food or shelter.
72. You are quite willing to stay somewhere where there's
a person who completely resents your presence.
73. You know, you will never again take
things for granted.
74. You quite abruptly find out who your true friends
75. You feel qualified to write a book entitled 'Resource
76. You unexpectedly find yourself on an hour-long train
episode of thinking happened when a lovely man who I
used to work for had (for the 4th or 5th week running)
NOT paid me my wages, I had been evicted and was due
in Perth for Niko's wedding. Note: I am STILL owed approximately
$2600 in wages by this character. (Steve Sanderson).
What the hell is it with us, yes I generalise to include
most people in this, that makes us morbid?! Why do we
enjoy watching something gruesome? Why do we flock in
the thousands to watch the latest war movie? - even these days (2002)...
Why do people stop to watch at a traffic accident, a
personal injury or a street fight? Is it simply because
it's out of the ordinary and thus curious (because it's
something we don't often see), or is there more to it?
Similarily, why are so many of us drawn to the 'dark
side'? I know I am.... but I don't know why...
I don't know what got me thinking about this, but I've
definately thought about it before. I mentioned war
movies before, but besides war movies, a LOT of movies
feature what a civilised society would call negative,
as the ideal or as cool or to be desired. A hero who
is rough, unrefined, violent and/or otherwise. How many
times is the central character (our hero) a criminal?...
been suggested, by a friend, that the reason we stop
to watch a traffic accident where someone(s) has been
injured is partly because we are relieved(that it's
not us - and thus feel fortunate) and partly out of
empathy. Along those lines, I guess it's also to get
closure, that is wanting to know the person will be
alright after all.... wouldn't want to go home thinking
the person might be dead or still suffering...
But this doesn't explain why we choose a violent or
depressing film over a Robin Williams flick....
Why have I always liked fighting? Why am I self-destructive?....
Later I might come up with some answers, but till then...Meh....
day in Sept....
Addition to 'Expectations'
seems that 'no' expectations is a bit much to ask for,
in the human condition...at least that is if I am human.....really
thought I could stick to and live by my golden rule
'to have no expectations', until tonight brought all
that to a crushing stand-still... having been let-down
for the ump-teenth time (by friends), I finally snapped...snapped
to what? To not caring about anything? who knows...
too drunk to decide, but one thing is for certain....
you really can decide who is meaningful to you in times
where the close-people let you down....even if you don't
like who that 'who' is......
Idea: NO SUCH THING AS AN EVIL PERSON
It was Plato (he might have got the idea from his teacher,
Socrates) who suggested that people are not evil and
they don't do bad things because they are evil.
Plato explained that he believes people are not motivated
by evil to commit evil acts. Instead they are
motivated by self-gratification.
No matter how 'bad' we consider a person's actions,
Plato was sure that even the worst actions are the motivated
by a desire to help themselves.
I agree with this 99.9%. Which is to say that it makes
the most sense to me and I cannot find ANY reason to
dispute the idea.
No matter how may examples you run through your mind,
when you try to explain the motivation behind the 'evil'
act, it always relates to some form of self-gratification
(to gain something, to feel better, out
of desire to relieve... or whatever) not 'evil' itself..
pondered this idea for many years, but I write it down
now because recently I brought the idea up with someone
at my work who was dead-set against the idea.
I don't think he understood it properly, but non-the-less,
I want other people to consider the idea too. Why? Well
at the very least; because it's interesting. At most,
well it could help people world-wide (thinking of all
the global problems between peoples in the world) understand
mankind better and thus help to solve differences. It's
part of the nature of manind. We are selfish. But not
evil, I think. These so called evil-people are simply
selfish people (concerned with their selfish needs)
who are doing the wrong thing through ignorance.
I read a letter to the Editor (The West Australian)
recently where a woman was expressing her sadness at
yet another terrorsit attack. What got me annoyed was
her ridiculous assumption (which one would think even she should have picked up, as soon as she wrote
She writes: "I don't think this is what God had
planned when He created man."
<- Is she saying then, God can make mistakes???!
What is God to her then? My understanding of what people
call 'God' is that God is a supreme perfect being -
not capable of making errors. What this lady blatantly
over-looks is the OBVIOUS!- God even, as described in
her Christian bible, gave mankind FREEDOM of choice!
In doing so, we are capable of making mistakes! Furthermore,
I think Mrs Jensen is mistaken to think that God intended
something other than what is going on! As bad
as things get 'down here' (on earth), there is a lot
of good too. Without the bad things we would not learn
much at all. So I'm saying that not only would 'God'
have forseen these terrorsit attacks, but (and perhaps
a bit more controversially), I believe they are 'intended'
(to use her word), so that mankind can LEARN!
No, I'm not thinking about mythical creatures of another
world. I'm thinking of the demons we carry around inside
us. Or some of us do anyway.
What got me thinking about this was something I read
in Harvey Keitel's autobiography(unauthorised). Harvey
Keitel is a man who has lived with demons most of his
life, it's what makes him so good at playing dark or
tortured characters. He quotes a verse from the bible
which reads; "If you bring forth what is within
you, what is within you will save you. If you do not
bring forth what is whithin you, what is within you
will destroy you" (Gospel of Thomas). It's the
'destroy you' part that got me thinking...
I have long been aware of my demons. Ever since I left
my ex-wife I have had little monsters crawling around
trying to make me miserable. Things like feeling self-doubt,
guilt, anger repression and so on. The thing is; I didn't
take them seriously. Ever. I figured, for starters,
they are only small demons, so they can't do me much
harm. Secondly, they would take more effort to remove
than would be worthwhile.
I was wrong. So very wrong in fact. It is now over 7
years since 'they' first appeared and I am still being
effected by 'them'. Actually it's gotten worse, because
now a host of 'side-effects' have begun to surface.
Things like stress. It wasn't until I read what Harvey
Keitel was saying, that I realised...fuck....they will
destroy me if I don't face them and bring them out.
And that is all. Hopefully the first step in many, till
finally I am rid of all past demons.
It's ironic that I, who can relate to just about anyone
and just about anyone's feelings, would get accused
of having 'Empathic Failure'!
None the less this was said to me by a very dear friend
(who's a psychologist) after I laughed my ass off at
something she said about her family. I'm
only writing about it here because I think 'Empathic
Failure' is a funny idea, and a funny thing to accuse
someone of having! I laughed even harder when she said
'Empathic Failure'! tee hee hee hee!
I think most people SHOULDN'T have children.
Apart from the horrible ammount (25%) that get abused
and apart from the cop-out: 'state of the world', there
are many other reasons why I believe only very few people ought to have kids...
I question people's motives.
How many people have children
for SELFISH or the WRONG reasons?...
(1) Want to carry on their family name
(2) Want little images of themselves running around
(3) Want to re-live childhood through kids
(4) Want kids as source of own enjoyment
(5) Want/fear/need someone to look after them when they
(6) Pa/maternal INSTINCT...<--what?, are we ANIMALS
that are slaves to our primal instincts?!!
(7) Social expectations.....ugh!....
(8) To use as crutches(or a lever) in ailing relationships
etc etc etc
Then there's the list
of reasons why couples should think twice for their
(Note many couples
don't realise these until their kids leave home!!!)
(1) Ridiculous ammount of money it will cost for the
next 18-25 years
(2) Stress caused for the next 18-25 years
(3) Many young couples/parents to be don't realise that
they will RARELY be appreciated for making huge
(4) SACRIFICES... So many sacrifices people don't think
about.. Are people thinking BEFORE they 'do it' that
they will be sacrificing so many things which they enjoy
LIST of LIKELY areas in
their life which will be lost or reduced (Some of the
(1) Passion in their relationship / sex-life
(2) Time for couple's relationship
(3) Personal time /personal growth (e.g. further eductation)
(4) Energy levels
(5) Lifestyle - no/less luxuries, like holidays, getaways,
boats, better homes etc etc
(6) Friendships/social life
(7) Some Career goals will go out the window
If all people who had babies all had them for reasons
OTHER than the above and with all the negative points
in mind, I think that couples having children would
be a rarity and the world would be a better place because
the children that ARE born to it are coming from rare
people who are really prepared to make a life's-work
(like a masterpiece...) of parenting and who would go
into parenthood properly prepared.
Want to help? - Join http://vhemt.org/ (The Voluntary Human Extinction Movement)
RIGHT to MAKE FIRE!
feel my basic human
rights have been violated.
recently found out that we
are not allowed to make fire at the 'fire pit' that we have always gone to make fire at...
So, I thought to myself today; 'Where can I
The answer is: Nowhere.
In your own back yard on YOUR property? No.
At the beach, safely beside the ocean? No.
Some woods? Not here(Queensland, Australia), not for
about 2 years (fire ban in place)....
MAKING fire is important to me!
Fire is how we humans evolved,
fire was (is) and essential part of who we are!
Everyone on Earth should be able to make a fire!
We have enjoyed this ability for thousands and thousands
For food, for warmth, for power, for protection and
for beauty and fun!
UNDER CONSTRUCTION ----
(gone to toilet to think)
please do not e-mail me to tell me
I am aware
that my spelling is not as good as my thinking.